


Entangled in complicated webs

by Amakilea



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Drama & Romance, Eventual Romance, F/M, Light Angst, Lost Love, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-15 04:08:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29678208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amakilea/pseuds/Amakilea
Summary: Emilio and Bokuto had dated in high school before she had gone away for school. They had done the smart thing and had split up with little to no contact. They meet again when they were both coming back home. Old feelings come back things get complicated after years of longing.
Relationships: Bokuto Koutarou/Original Female Character(s), Bokuto Koutarou/Reader, Iwaizumi Hajime/Original Character(s)
Kudos: 4





	1. Into your arms

Emiko was so tired that she was almost sleepwalking, She could never fall asleep on planes; it wasn’t a phobia or anything, maybe it was the altitude or watching the night sky or the fact she had a mountain of work to complete so she could have a decent visit home, but being awake for that long, often left the young woman in a zombielike state. Her skull felt so heavy but just a little longer, and she would be at home. 

Going to luggage claim, Emiko picked up her suitcase and walked out of the terminal yawning.

“Baby owl?” 

Dazed, Emiko turned her head, the nickname that had been given so long ago making her face beam. That smile fell when she realised what that meant. Oh, god, it was him.

“Bo?”

The last time Emiko had seen Bokuto was at an airport in Japan when she moved away from Tokyo for college. It was a great opportunity, and Bokuto had wanted her to leave and finish her education. She would have been stupid not to go. But Emiko had to keep reminding herself of that, because the look on his face wet with tears when she had gone had almost killed her. 

Emiko had worn an enormous pair of sunglasses, holding on to his hand and avoiding Bokuto’s gaze. His thumb stroking her knuckles as he spoke and laughed. They both were dreading what was coming next. He lifted Emiko’s glasses and saw just how red and puffy her eyes were. And that was it. The floodgates opened.

He had broken down. Emiko could not stop the tears from streaming down her face. How she had loved her big horned owl, and she held on to him for as long as she could. The choice to split up that day was a logical one, but she wanted to take it back. 

Bokuto needed to concentrate on volleyball and not some girl over six thousand miles away. She had her education to think about and had such a great opportunity ahead of her she needed to focus. Despite the want to keep him close, Emiko had wanted Bokuto to be happy. If that meant being with someone that wasn’t her, then so be it.

Emiko ran toward him, tiredness gone. Her horned owl had said her name. It was what had been missing from her world; Emiko hadn’t known it, but those two words had made a spark spring to life.

Emiko leapt into his arms, something she had been doing since high school - Bokuto always caught her no matter what direction she had been coming from. After volleyball matches, Emiko would run up to him jumping, and he would always catch her. It didn’t matter if he was talking to someone or lost in thought after losing a game, Bokuto’s powerful muscular arms would wrap around Emiko. His smile lit up the room as he called her ‘pretty girl’ or ‘baby owl’.

Just as always, Bokuto caught Emiko. His face sunk into her neck and inhaled the familiar scent, ignoring everyone around him. His hold was so tight but Emiko’s was even more so. Tears welled in brown eyes, but Emiko buried her head into his shoulder.

“Are you real?” Bokuto asked against her hair, thinking he was dreaming. Four years of birthday messages, season's greetings but never seeing each other because it would have been too painful.

Emiko couldn’t speak, her throat closing up as she tried not to cry. It was cliché but Bokuto was her best friend, a sunny place to go when life was too hard to cope with, and she had needed his light to make things ok again. 

Memories filled her head of all their times together when she would jump on his back, laughing as he charged down the hall and shot a deafening war cry until Akaashi would admonish them both declaring they were disturbing the peace of the school and classes, and they weren’t children.

Emiko pulled back, looking at his spiked white grey hair and golden eyes. They hadn’t changed, he hadn’t changed. Closing her eyes, Emiko leaned her forehead against his not wanting to let go of him. Lifting her chin, Bokuto got close to her. “Pretty girl-”

But then reality hit her, slamming Emiko back to earth as she felt a tugging at her back. “What do you think you are doing?”

Putting her feet back onto the ground, Emiko noticed the looks that they were receiving and the phones out, no doubt snapping pictures. Not a good look at all. Emiko cursed under her breath. 

It was at that moment that Emiko finally looked at the woman who stood beside Bokuto dark eyes narrowed in Emiko’s direction. They were both checking each other out and Emiko felt so underwhelming it as embarrassing. The woman was stunning no other words would have done her justice, Dressed impeccably not a hair on her dark head was out of place, she sidled closer to Bokuto

“This is Rei, Rei this is a friend of mine. We went to school together.” 

Looking from Rei then back to Bokuto realisation hit Emiko like a ton of bricks. “Oh, are you…?” Emiko smiled, though she wanted to go back to a minute ago when there was the chance she could have her sunshine back.

The woman looked smug and Bokuto looked plainly confused by what was going on. Refusing to show any emotion except happiness for him and his new life, Emiko bowed to the woman and then to Bokuto who reached for her a strange look on his face. “Baby owl?”

“Goodbye Bokuto.” Emiko said with a smile as she bowed again. She rushed towards her discarded bags, head held high as she left the airport as fast as her feet would carry her. It was only when she got into the taxi that she fell apart. 

Her sunny place was gone.

  
  
  



	2. Somewhere else

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bokuto is reeling from seeing his ex in the airport he is even more confused by why she left so quickly. With his thoughts on Emiko he remembers the first time he ever met her

_ Bokuto was in a daze as he watched the pretty girl wearing the white T-shirt and shorts hand out water bottles to the other volleyball players. She was laughing, the sound genuine with her eyes closed and head tilted back, making the sun gleam off her rich, sienna skin. Her braids swung as she bumped Kaori with her hip. _

_ Then, out of nowhere, she was in front of him, the dimple in her cheek deepening. She spoke animatedly while her white teeth showed with each smile. _

_ “Bokuto-san...Bokuto-san!” Akaashi’s voice penetrated his mind. He blinked, not understanding what either of them had been talking about but noticing the cold water bottle in his hand. _

_ “I like water?” _

_ “I do too.” The girl looked confused by the response, grinning as she waved goodbye.  _

_ “Akaashi, do you think I made a good impression?” _

_ “No, she thinks your name is like water.“ Akaashi spoke in his usual stoic tone.  _

_ Ignoring Bokuto he followed the team towards the hall, throwing the volleyball into the air. _

_ “Yeah, I did.” He answered as he watched her walk away with the rest of the managers “... wait Akaashi! You told her my name though, right?..Akaashi!” _

_ The memory of Emiko walking away always stuck in his mind. She had glanced over her shoulder smiling at him.  _

_ “Bokuto-san… Bokut-san… Bokuto-san…” _

_ His vision came back into focus and the noise made him flinch a little. Looking around he tried to remember where he was and why people had their phones out. _

“Huh?” Bokuto said dazed, looking down at Rei who was smiling as always. Glancing up,he watched Emiko walk away with her suitcase in hand like she hadn’t been in his arms moments before. What had just happened? What had caused her to walk away like that? He always found himself looking at her back.

“Bokuto-san...Bokuto-san if we do not hurry, you are going to be late and you are supposed to train with your team early tomorrow morning.”

Taking his carry on from his grip, Rei looked at Bokuto. He was watching the strange girl walk away - she hadn’t liked the way he had held her so close as if they had intimate knowledge of each other. Standing in front of him, Rei waved a dainty hand in his face. “We should leave Bokuto-san.”

Rubbing a hand at the back of his head, Bokuto smiled at Rei taking his bag back from her, waving to the cameras and wondering how big the shit storm was going to be from this stunt he had pulled as he walked out of the airport.

Getting into the car, Bokuto took out his phone and scrolled from friends' pages until he found the picture of Emiko. He hesitated. He had unfollowed her because it hurt too much to see her and not be with her. His parents and sisters sometimes let slip how she was doing. Hesitating for just a moment longer, he pressed the friend request button and looked out of the window again.

Bokuto was half listening to Rei, half looking out of the window, his mind elsewhere. He could still feel her in his arms, the softness of her skin, the way her braids had fallen into her dark beautiful eyes. It had been so long since he had seen her but it felt like it was just yesterday. He had put his all into volleyball, becoming a good player and teammate, no longer becoming depressed on the court but instead striving to be best, a reliable person people could depend on.

“B-Bokuto-san...did you hear me?”

Bokuto shook his head and smiled down at Rei who held up the papers in her hand trying to show him something. He hadn’t heard a word she had said but he was a pro at acting like was listening; he simply shrugged his shoulders with a little sigh.

“Sorry Rei, I am just tired do you mind if I read this later? I can get it signed and give it to you when the team trains again.”

Nodding her head, Rei put the documents into a folder and handed it to him. The quiet lingered between them before Rei cleared her throat, sitting up straight 

“Who was that woman? The foreign one who jumped on you? At first I thought she was a crazy fan but you said you knew her?”

Bokuto didn’t want to look at Rei as he thought of a suitable answer. “Yes, we went to the same high school, I haven’t seen her in a few years.”

Rei waited for more information figuring there was more to the story but Bokuto kept quiet not saying anything else.

The rest of the car drive was quiet, Rei on her phone and Bokuto looking out of the window watching the city go by, startled when the car stopped. Rei began to take her seatbelt off but Bokuto’s hand was on her strapping her back in,

“Rei it is ok I can make it up to my room. Go home and relax for a few days, I will see you at practice,”

Smiling, Bokuto exited the car collecting his suitcase and carry-on waving at Rei as he went into the hotel. Taking out her phone Rei looked at his fan page and saw the video and sighed. Just great, these fans found out everything in minutes though it made her wonder exactly who this girl was. As the car began to drive again, she made a phone call wondering how much she could find out.

Throwing his bag on the bed, Bokuto collapsed ignoring the pounding in his head and the constant pinging of his phone. It wouldn’t stop and letting out a frustrated mini yell he picked up his phone and looked at the 50 messages from the team group chat. A video of Emiko leaping onto Bokuto filled the screen making his heart stop.

_ It was real. _

So were the curious questions from his teammates who thought it was some kind of over enthusiastic fan. The team captain was less than happy about this unwanted attention to the team 

[ **Meian** ]:  **_Bokuto we want everyone to be talking about us as a team and the new season not you manhandling fans. Please try harder to keep them away._ **

Throwing his phone back on the bed, Bokuto showered then got into bed watching the video again. Those few seconds felt like a lifetime. He fell asleep missing the notification from Emiko accepting his friend request.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song title is from Razorlights song somewhere else which is what I had on repeat while writing this. 
> 
> Hope you like and once again thank you to my Bear for supporting me!


	3. Unravel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: panic attack, scratching, blood
> 
> Bokuto’s dreams won’t seem to let him rest peacefully, deciding to clear his thoughts he left in a worse state than before.

_ Bokuto heard the laughter, people were looking at him whispering behind their hands, and saw the way they pointed at him. _

_ He didn't know what to say or do, smile slipping from his face.Bokuto left the classroom forgetting all of his belongings. He found a place he could hide; if he disappeared and just made himself small no one would see him. If he was small, then he wouldn’t be noticed. _

_ Maybe they were right -maybe he was dumb, a big, stupid idiot who had no talent. The statements went around in his brain dragging him into that dark place he tried to avoid.  _

_ Bokuto buried his head into his knees pulling at his hair as he blocked the world out trying to get the voices to stop. _

_ “Bokuto-san...Bokuto-san are you in here?” _

_ He could hear someone calling to him, but he was so lost in his thoughts that he only knew an someone was actually talking to him when he felt someone sitting beside him. It was quiet, and he wasn’t sure if the person was still there or just watching him. _

_ “Do you think I’m stupid?” The question was forced from him, but he had to ask and see if the people in that class were right. _

_ “No, I don’t.” _

_ “I’m not good at anything.” _

_ “You are great at so many things- “ _

_ “Not school- “ _

_ “You are good at school, you just think differently.” _

_ Bokuto lifted his head and looked to the side, noticing full lips, a tiny dimple in left cheek, and deep onyx eyes. She scooted closer and their knees touched, making her dark curls bounce a little as she spoke in hushed tones. _

_ “You are one of the best Ace’s in Japan, your team picked you as captain because they respect and trust you so much. You work so hard to make sure your team is the strongest and to make sure you shock the opposition. You, Bokuto, are one of the smartest guys I know.” _

_ What would it be like to touch her? Her brown skin looked so soft and the tiny spark in her eyes looked like stars. Was that why people enjoyed looking to the midnight sky? Because it was infinite and endless? Her voice was so calming that he listened to her. _

_ “What if I fail and don’t get onto any team at all when I graduate?” _

_ “You will, you are strong and determined. When you put your mind to it, you can do anything.” _

_ “But I am failing Nakajima-“ _

_ “Then I will tutor you.” She didn’t even hesitate. Her smile widened, face moving closer into focus. “I will come to practice making study guides. When you aren’t at practice you are with me. We can even combine the two.” _

_ “W-with you?” Was he blushing? Oh, god, he was so uncool! Why was he blushing at a time like this? She was going to think he was such a loser. He had to be cool. _

_ “Yeah I mean Kaori will be with you guys so I will have company and I want to help you.” _

_ Bokuto smiled at her, and she put her hand on top of his, squeezing a little before letting go. _

_ “I don’t deserve a friend like you.” _

_ He didn’t want to use those words for her; he felt more than friendship for her, since that day he saw her, and she had given him a bottle of water. It had taken a month before he could talk to her without stammering or running in the other direction. _

_ Standing up and stretching, he offered his hand. Emiko reached out, but her hand slipped through his fingers as she fell disappearing into darkness.  _

Bokuto gripped the sheets almost tearing at the material as he forced himself to sit up. There was a weight on his back, dragging him down but he had to wake up. He had to sit up and open his eyes - this couldn’t be real. He could see the way her dark eyes widened with fear, but he couldn’t get to her.

Inhalation was loud. Bokuto looked around, golden eyes squinting to catch sight of what might have been wrong.. Was there an earthquake? What was going on? Lifting his hand he noticed how badly he was shaking. A cold sweat trickled down his spine making the shaking worse. 

With unsteady hands, he blindly reached for the glass on his bedside table draining the glass in one gulp before flopping back down on the bed. His breathing slowed. Bokuto resisted the urge to close his eyes, not wanting to be drawn back into that dream again. Picking up his phone he looked at the time.

_ 4:00am _

_ Shit...  _ It was too late to go back to sleep; he had early morning practice but he was still tired. Groaning loudly, Bokuto dragged himself out of bed rubbing his face with the heel of his hand. He flipped on the light as he pulled on jogging bottoms, hoodie and headphones. Picking up his phone he pulled his hood up and left his hotel room choosing to walk the three flights of stairs as a warm up rather than take the elevator.

There was a slight mist in the air, his breath visible as he turned on a playlist and began to jog, pacing himself and setting out a good rhythm watching out for taxis and the few cars as he crossed the roads.

He couldn’t remember a time when he was so frayed; his head was so clouded and no matter how much he tried to think of something else.

Bokuto began to jog, his mind clouded by the memory of what happened in his dream. He couldn’t remember a time when a dream had left him so  _ scared _ .

He had only seen her once, so why was she the only thing that he could think of? She had jumped into his arms only to have her walk away again….Why was she always walking away from him? Why was her back the only thing he always saw? 

Emiko’s face began to disappear again, fading into nothingness and Bokuto could feel the burning in his chest. He couldn’t feel his limbs anymore but he kept moving his body not allowing him to stop for a single moment - he had to stop thinking of her.

_ He couldn’t breathe. _

Bokuto’s jog had turned into a mad dash. He closed his eyes and the last vision of her smile disappeared. He hit the concrete hard, skin scraping against the gravel. 

_ He couldn’t  _ **_BREATHE!_ ** __

Nails scraped against the thin layer of flesh on his neck breaking the skin and feeling a burning sensation. Struggling to get air into his lungs the world began to spin making it hard for him to concertante on anything. 

_ Try to breathe, he needed to breathe! _

On all fours Bokuto attempted to make himself small, he tried to focus on the blade of grass in front of his face but the colour blurred before his eyes.

**_Just breathe_ **

_ He could hear her voice, her thumbs putting pressure onto his palm, smiling as she tried to calm him down from the freak out that was happening.  _

**_Bokuto, just breathe and think about the way the ball feels against your hand. If you can feel the ball against your hand then you can breathe._ **

The gasp was loud as a rush of sweet cold air stung his resistant lungs. Coughing until tears spilled and spit fell down his face, Bokuto felt a wave of dizziness wash over him. He wiped his mouth with trembling fingers as lay on the ground breathing heavily. He could hear his heartbeat thumping in his ears, blood jumped through his veins and he was terrified. 

What was wrong with him?

Bokuto laid there for what seemed like hours, his head hurting but he forced himself to roll over onto his stomach and get up unsteadily. He had no idea where he was.

How far had he run before he went crashing to the ground?

Finding the main road Bokuto flagged down a taxi, happy that one actually stopped for him considering he was covered in grass stains. He went back to the hotel determined that he would pull himself together before practice began.

Bokuto avoided the gaze of the hotel staff as he took the elevator back to his room, stripping quickly. He went into the shower and dipped his head under the hot water trying to control his breathing. Wincing as the shampoo touched his skin he ignored the pain and quickly washed his hair hearing the alarm clocking telling him to get his ass together.

Drying his hair, brushing his teeth and packing his bag Bokuto went into the fridge picking up a bottle of water and a banana before running out of the door. The car was already waiting outside for him. The driver looked annoyed but opened the door for him. Bowing slightly in apology Bokuto got into the car quickly eating his banana, sending a message telling them he was going to be late.

Putting his headphone into his ear he drifted off to sleep for what felt like seconds before the driver shook his shoulder. Yawning Bokuto got out of the car with his bag dragging slightly across the floor as he made his way into the sports hall knowing he was in trouble for being so late. 

Bokuto could hear the squeaking of sneakers on the floor before he even got near to the door. Opening the door it looked like they were doing a practice game, things were even since he and the captain were not around. The door slammed behind him causing a few noncommittal “Morning” With a weak smile on his face he raised his hand in greeting, fighting off a yawn.

“Hey, hey, hey…What?” 

The room was quiet, everyone's eyes were on him, some looking shocked and others looking pleased? He looked behind him to see if he missed something. His team came closer looking at his neck talking amongst themselves.

Sakusa handed him antibacterial ointment muttering about the amount of dirt and germs beneath fingernails before walking off. Bokuto said thanks but as he looked down at the ointment he flinched at the touches to his neck.

Atsumu tilted Bokuto’s head to the side laughing “Looks like Bokuto had a late night. Was it the fan that jumped on you? She was hot!” 

“Huh? No I just overslept-”

Inunaki’s laugh drowned out Bokuto’s response “With who a tiger? Bokuto you need to tell your girlfriend to calm down, she might leave a scar on you next time.” 

“No there was no girl-”

Barnes grinned, pushing Atsumu to take a better look at the marks. He pulled at the neck of his top whistling, “Hey Tomas, do you think we could get a fan to jump onto us and do this?” 

Tomas leaned onto Barnes laughing “Come on Bokuto what is her name? You were holding onto for too long for her to be just be a fan. Who is she?”

Bokuto smiled a little, rubbing at the back of his head not sure what to say. He could feel his heart begin to race, the room taking on a hazy glow; he was trying to keep breathing.

“Coach Foster is here, we better warm up!” Hinata warned, looking at the coach who entered the room. Everyone began to walk away laughing. Only Hinata stayed looking Bokuto in the eyes looking worried. “Bokuto-san are you ok?”

“I-I am fine Shōyō. You should warm up.” Smiling at the younger player, Bokuto set down his bag in the corner and pretended to do up his laces. Bokuto tried to calm his breathing. He had no idea he had done that to himself; he needed to concentrate on practicing for the upcoming game - nothing else mattered.

Hearing his name being called Bokuto jogged over to the team listening to the Coaches ideas on plays.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi hope you like the chapter

**Author's Note:**

> I have had a bunch of Bokuto stuff in my head so I decided to write it out. Hope you like it, comments are welcomed.
> 
> I am awful at titles names and summaries so they may change. Title names will probably be based on the song I am listening to at the time.
> 
> I want to say thank you to my friend Bear who listen to me throw my ideas at her and reading over my work for me.


End file.
